Shut up and listen. I seem to remember a quote I put on here about the wise man who listens. I wish I could apply it to myself. I do consider myself a good listener but paradoxically I often do not know when to shut up.
Cases in point:
I have an awkward moment in a friendship at the moment. Well it may not be awkward, it may be all in my head. (That’s something else I am good at: over-analysis, but we’ll leave that for another posting.) Either way I need to shut up. I keep trying to work out what I should have said or what I should say next time, but what I need to do is stay quiet, no matter how irritated I feel. Giving a response just makes matters worse.
Nod and smile.
I also had a meeting the other day when I said too much. Ironically one piece of advice the person I was talking to gave me, was to listen. Let the other person talk, find their needs and weaknesses. I also gave way to my bad habit of letting my feelings show on my face. Sometimes I jumped in and interrupted because my mind does zap around. And I was to quick to turn down an offer of help – another bad habit of mine: not wanting to put people to any trouble. Good grief if they are offering me help – take it! I also tend to verbalise negatives – what I can’t do, or if I have a problem blocking me. People don’t want to hear that.
Well, writing all that down here makes it sound ten times worse than it was, but I really do have to bear these things in mind.
Don’t explain, don’t complain.
Some of you may remember that?